I am having some trouble with the ending of the film and could really use some help. Here is the Set up.
Natalie shoots Seth then runs into the kitchen to call for an ambulance. While lying there dying, Shakti enters and tries to help. She tells Seth that the only way she can stop the bleeding is to use acupuncture. Now, throughout this new draft I have established the fact that Seth is afraid of needles because his mother used them to take drugs. As it stands now the scene is a little flat. Since Natalie is in the kitchen it needs to go faster and have more dramatic tension between Shakti and Seth. Any suggestions? Oh, by the way I introduced the character of little Seth into this new draft.
NATALIE
I can't stop the bleeding. It's really bad. I don't want you to die, Logan. Logan!
Logan's eyes open again. He caresses Natalie's hair.
LOGAN
Don't worry... I've got a plan. I need my herbs.
His eyes close.
NATALIE
No! Just hold on for me.
Natalie runs into the kitchen, grabs the phone, and calls for an ambulance.
NATALIE
This is detective Natalie Stewart, I need an ambulance at 1501 Bloom street Apartment 3A, now! I have an officer down!
Logan's eyes open. Before him stands the little boy. Logan is pleasantly surprised.
LOGAN
Hey, little man.
The boy smiles.
LOGAN
We're okay now. I think it's time to say goodbye.
The boy puts his hand out reaching for Logan. Logan takes it and falls back. He drifts away, eyes closing.
She walks into the room. She throws a hand full of herbs on Logan's open wound. Using some gauze tape, she wraps it up stopping the bleeding. A damp towel is placed across his forehead. Logan, springs back to life. His eyes open to a unexpected sight before him -
SHAKTI holding the towel.
SHAKTI
Seth, can you hear me my love?
LOGAN
Yes.
SHAKTI
You're dying. I have to use a needle to stop the bleeding.
LOGAN
No, no, please don't.
SHAKTI
It's the only way I can save you.
Shakti pulls out one of her long needles. Seth closes his eyes. Shakti injects it into Seth's shoulder directly under his skin. Seth bites down on his lip.
LOGAN
I'm afraid. Will it hurt?
SHAKTI
It's already over.
Logan opens his eyes. Shakti kisses him then hugs him tightly. He feels content and comforted. The bleeding has stopped and the pain has gone away. However, another figure comes into the picture. It is the little boy. He wraps his arms around Shakti and Logan, smiling. He too is content and comforted. Shakti senses his presence but cannot see him. She is a bit spooked but brushes it off.
Natalie races back into the bedroom carrying the FIRST AID KIT. She sees an empty room. She walks over toward the front door which is wide open. Logan is gone. A tear rolls down Natalie's cheek.
END